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Like a kid in a Toy Shop

By: Robert Thomson

The toys of my childhood seemed far more appealing then the dirge of modern remakes the kids of this era are forced to play with. I remember He-man, GI Joe, and Smurfs… even My Little Pony seemed cooler than a skinny plastic Iron Man toy which shoots weak plastic darts. I see my childhood with rose-tinted glasses and the toys I used to play with were hardy, fun to play with and kept me amused for hours on end. Toy Shops were massive and a hidden secret lurked inside each one. When I look at the modern remakes or classic interpretations of my favourite toys, I little piece of me dies inside. As a child from the 80’s, I did not have to suffer the same barrage of media branding which kids today have to accept. It seemed much simpler back then.

Where did it all begin, my earliest toy-related memory that is. I vaguely remember a toy robot that ran across my bedroom floor, shooting sparks from its mouth as I ran away crying like a baby (I may have very well still been a baby). My first real obsessions were the He-man, GI Joe and Transformer toys. Between me, my brother and my cousins, we had every toy and add-on these collections could offer. Hours were worn out creating elaborate setups and episode re-enactments. One should note that these cartoons that our toys were based on where not merely cheap knockoffs, designed to sell more toys to unsuspecting children. No sir, elaborate storylines and quality animation played a huge part in creating an authentic universe which breathed life into our toys. I do not even want to start with my Thundercats obsession, a craze which due to my constant nagging almost drove my parents into a permanent state of dementia.

It was also noticeably easier to collect toys back then. The price of an average action figure hovered around R20, 00 but it was chiefly because of our parents who would purchase toys for us. If I was to attempt to build my own collection of toys, it would be considerably smaller due to the insane prices of even the smallest action figure or Lego collection. Ah, Lego. Lego was a wonderful construction set. Whole cities could be built from nothing with a little bit of imagination and patience. I was entered into many Lego competitions as a kid, yet won no prizes despite having the most incredible time. The Dutch giants will never be as big as they were in the 80’s, yet they are still capitalising on our childhood dreams by releasing special Lego Star Wars or Indiana Jones playsets. I believe their star began to drop shortly after kids began choking on blocks of Lego, yet funnily enough this type of ordeal never happened back in the 80’s.

It’s strange how time distorts your memory of childhood fascinations. These fantasy toys of yesteryear become little more than dusty dolls without curious little hands to breathe life into them. I know that as the children of 2008 grow into adults, they too will share the same idle fascination I do with toys and games. Or more likely they will play video games for hours on end. Yet they may share my same view as well, that of nostalgia and distain for whatever modern generation of toys dare crowd the toy shelves of modern toy stores. I worry what next-generation batch of toys will attract my child’s attention and empty my wallet.

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