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Myths of Divorce

Divorce is a phenomenon that is becoming increasingly popular. Modern day expectation of marriage is unable to contend with reality and, therefore, divorce rates are increasing. Further, the social stigma attached to divorce is slowly disappearing. There are myths relating to divorce that get passed down, all of which are not necessarily true or relevant.

Women Suffer More

The commonly held notion is that women suffer more emotional damage than men after getting divorced. This is because women are viewed as the more emotional and gentle of the genders. However, that is not reason enough to make a generalised statement that women suffer more. In normal circumstances, both a man and a woman invest equally in building a life together. How they approach a relationship may be different but cannot be termed as less or more.

When a marriage has broken up due to infidelity, then the spouse who has been cheated on goes through greater emotional turmoil. There are different reasons that lead a spouse to straying and it can be either the husband or wife who has an affair. While the partner who has the affair might be repentant, it is the other partner who suffers emotional damage. It affects a person’s self-esteem and their ability to trust again.

Historically, it is possible that more men have had affairs than women, but in the modern era, one cannot make a categorical statement like that. When a man has been cheated on by his wife, he can be as devastated as if it had been the other way around. Therefore, it is not entirely right to say that women suffer more after divorce.

Divorce is the End of the Road

Considering that divorce does not arise from a happy situation, it has always been expected that spouses would be bitter towards each other. The equation which a couple shares, is something, only they understand. Two people, who fall in love and get married, discover that they cannot live together. This leads to a whole lot of complications which eventually lead to divorce.

Some couples find that while they didn’t make good married partners, they make great friends. The issues that existed while living under the same roof, no longer exist when they are apart. Therefore, they are able to put their differences and marriage behind and continue to have a great relationship as friends. There is absolutely no bitterness and they understand that while marriage didn’t work out, it doesn’t have to be the end of the road.

If the issues in a marriage have been traumatic and there is cheating or abuse involved, then it becomes difficult for couples to be friendly after getting divorced. Too much turmoil has been caused for one or both of them to forgive and forget. Sometimes, while couples may not be the best of friends after getting divorced, they may share a cordial relationship because of their children. How two people interact after getting divorced, depends solely on the circumstances that led to the divorce.

Remarriage

Another myth that exists is that men are more eager to remarry after getting divorced than women. Both the man and the woman suffer at least a certain amount of emotional damage after a divorce. How each copes depends on the kind of individual a person is rather than whether it is the man or the woman. Some people find it easier to put their bad marriage behind and take a second chance at love and marriage. Others battle with trust issues and low self-confidence and are unable to move on.

It might appear that men are more eager to get married than women post-divorce. However, the truth is, perhaps, that divorced men find it easier to get married again than divorced women. Over the years, there has been a certain stigma attached to divorced women that men seemed to have escaped. Since there have been fewer opportunities for women, it has probably been assumed that they are less eager to marry again.

The other reason why men may seem more eager to get married again is because they get used to having their home run for them. They find it difficult to be suddenly alone and run a home on their own. Women, on the other hand, are used to running a home on their own and do not find this difficult. However, the bottom line remains that it is difficult to determine post-divorce behaviour based solely on whether someone is a man or a woman.

Article Source: http://articleaddict.com

James Walsh is a freelance writer and copy editor. If you would like more information on how to get a quickie Divorce see www.quickie-divorce.com

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